Young student with aspirations to become a surgeon

Posted Thu 27th Apr 2017 at 10:18
by Brodie McCloy

Share

Whilst I love studying biology and chemistry, I would probably say that one of my key motivators to be a surgeon is the idea of being a surgeon with Tourette's. The very job would almost be oxymoronic in itself yet I feel as though there would be an enormous sense of achievement if I were able to have a medical career, all comedic value aside.

My name is Brodie McCloy and I am a fifteen year old female with Tourette Syndrome. My life has never been without these tics- one of my earliest memories is trying on pair after pair of shoes because I couldn't do my 'foot thing' (scrunching my toes and raising my big toe, a tic which has been omnipresent in my life). The onset of tics began at an early age, far before I was seven, but my tics have become far worse in my teenage years.

I suppose I'm far luckier than many others with regards to my own Tourette's; I am somewhat able to suppress the large jerks of limbs if not particularly viable- in assembly, for example- and haven't got any disruptive vocal tics. For me, Tourette's manifests itself in a plethora of ever-changing motor tics, embellished with a few vocal ones too. My face, neck and shoulders bear the vast majority of tics:

• Raising my eyebrows
• Grimacing
• Squinting
• Opening my mouth
• Blowing air into my mouth
• Pushing my jaw forward
• 'Chin ups' (I am sure to return to these in a later entry)
• Rolling my head until my neck muscles are sufficiently stretched
• Flexing my frontal neck muscles
• Clicking my shoulder blades (I can only do this properly with my left shoulder and feel entirely unsatisfied)

I'm not sure if that's all of them but it's enough for now.

With regards to the rest of my body, I have tics almost everywhere; each day is filled with random muscle-jerking and throwing out limbs like a dancer, a dancer who doesn't quite know the choreography. My shoulder and neck tics are, however, the worst by far. As I sit and write this, I am interrupted by an all-too familiar nagging sensation before I capitulate and twitch my shoulders then my neck, sometimes having to hold it with my hands so that it stretches in that 'just right' way.

I am very lucky. I know this. I have never been bullied for my tics as I know so many people have. Obviously, there were so many stares in primary school, more obvious after my diagnosis. Before this, I must have suppressed them as best I could because, back then, I didn't have a reason for it and couldn't justify why I needed to twitch all the time. However, in secondary school, my tics have worsened yet my social situation is far more comfortable. I told my friends about Tourettes in year eight and they weren't bothered, they just realised that 'oh, that's why she twitches all the time' and I felt a bit more comfortable with vocal ones when the whole class knew. As I said, no-one cares that much. My only problems really arise when I'm in a class or exam with people who aren't in my normal class and therefore don't know why I tic and assume that I'm being deliberately annoying- I'm sure that most people with TS have been imitated at some point. Luckily, these situations are rare enough for it not to be a problem- I tend to focus on not doing vocal tics too loudly. Even then, I wouldn't say it's a huge problem.

Someone once asked me whether or not I'd choose not to have Tourette's if I were given the option now. And in all honesty, I wouldn't. Tourettes is one of my 'quirks' and it's certainly not debilitating enough to warrant a great change to who I am. Tourettes is something that I can joke about, that my friends and family can joke about and I know that I can lead a full life with Tourettes, butt-clenching tics and all.

Return to blog